cough

At some point today it dawned on me that I am having trouble breathing.  I haven't been feeling great the last couple of days and then at some point today I realized my lungs feel heavy.  No longer around smoke, I am not sure what's causing this.  I took some Benadryl though because my throat was itchy and my cheeks were getting red and splotchy.  Seemed to help with the irritation but not the heavy lungs.  I have no idea...

All of this to say, I miss my husband.  When he called tonight he knew something was up and asked. I told him, he immediately started trying to diagnose me over the phone.  He thinks I have pneumonia... I don't think so.  I think my lungs are heavy.  LOL but I promised him that if I still felt like poo tomorrow I would go to the Dr.  For probably the only time in our relationship so far, I am hoping he is wrong.

Someone asked me recently what life is like for me here.  She watches that Army Wives show and wanted to know if it was right.  I told her I didn't know because I refuse to watch the show. Then I preceded to share with her what the life of an Army wife during a deployment is like. 
 

• Your cell phone is on your person and powered on at all times.  And just because you know it will vibrate when your soldier calls/messages you, you can't help but think that you missed one.  
• You don't watch the news.  The news you get is what filters down through Facebook or Yahoo! News or the local news station because they typically filter out all the war stuff.
• Things that never bothered you before are suddenly more overwhelming than you ever imagined.  Like shopping for toilet paper.  Now that it's just you using it, it lasts so much longer that you can't remember what kind you use... 
• Strangers knocking on your door freak you out.  Especially if they are wearing any kind of uniform...
• After month 7, you can hardly stand to hear other people talk about how lonely they are with their spouses gone for a weekend or a boyfriend and girlfriend whining about being apart. It is not pretty.  
• By month 11 all you want to do is punch the next person in the face that says, "Oh, he'll be home before you know it!"  or "This past year went by so fast for you guys I am sure!"  or "Oh!  I thought he was already home!"
• You get tired of hearing women complaining about their husbands or boyfriends. Saying they're too clingy or that they don't do something exactly the way she expected.  You just want to shake them.  You realize that the majority of people you know, don't know what it's like to truly appreciate their spouse and what is done for them.  
• In my instance. I feel more alone than ever before.  I have no family in BG.  My family is in IN and MI.  My husbands family is here and we are more like a combustible oil and water thing.  Not usually good.  Yes, you have good friends, but they don't get it.  They try to understand, they just don't.  
• You get aggravated cooking because it is hard enough to adjust a recipe to only feed 2 people, but to adjust it to be the right size for one, is almost impossible!  
•  All you seem to be able to think about is your soldier and what they are doing at that moment.  Hoping they are out of harms way and that they aren't having a freakin awful day.  
• You are constantly judged by what other people have heard about army wives before you.  Some assume you're a cheater, some assume you're a gold digger, some assume you needed residency or some other benefit that came with marrying a soldier... Typically they assume you're just after his money, though. 
• The ladies at the post office know you're name and why you're there.  
• They people at the gas station know your cigarette order for him when you pull up and have it rung up before you get to the counter. 
• The people at the hardware store know you and are more patient with you than you'd expect.  

There are many others for this list but I am falling asleep while compiling this so it will have to wait until maybe tomorrow. :)